4 a.m.

And the Insomnia Gods have blessed me. Yay. (wags flag listlessly)

Y'know the irritating thing about insomnia? You always feel so cheated. I should be asleep, not lying in bed twiddling my thumbs! All this sleep time, going to waste!

When I was a kid, I always thought it'd be kind of cool -- I'll study Greek at 3 in the morning! Yet, the actual study of Greek never seems to happen. So, now, a proverbial grown-up, I roll out of bed and read, or most recently, plot/write story(ies), or post meaningless entries to my blog.

I know why I have insomnia. I have insomnia because I'm an INTJ and had an important meeting today. That's pretty much it in a nutshell.

Would you like to know what that means? Of course you would. INTJ's are a temperment type rather rare in the US, though found in much higher percentages online, for reasons I'll probably go into in depth later, but, suffice to say, have to do with the distancing nature of the communication itself, and the ability to find communities of like-minded individuals with similar obsessions, modes of communication, and tendency towards obtuse jokes. Just accept it, and read a copy of David Kiersey's Please Understand Me to learn more.

So, I'm an INTJ, uber-rational and uber-rationalizing type, and I had an important meeting today. So, NATURALLY, I will spend the next week -- including all night tonight, apparently -- obsessing over what was said, what I did or did not do well, how I could have done better, what other people might have been thinking, what the overall outcome of the meeting was or was not, why or why not, and basically critiquing my performance up one side and down the other. INTJ's can be characterized by an immense self-confidence in their chosen field of expertise, and no one who knows us realizes how much we agonize over, basically, everything else. Agonize. No, really, I'm not exaggerating. INTJ's are the people who relentlessly rehearse phone calls. No wonder we're attracted to email and blogs and other delayed-message communication, with their capacities for soul-revealing introspection combined with opportunities for endless editing before publication. Not that we're the only type finding that attractive, that's more of an NT trait than one reserved just for INTJ's.

And the fact that I know all this about why I have insomnia doesn't actually help me get to sleep. No, no, it just gives me fodder for a rambling blog. Not quite the desired outcome, though useful at times. It's like knowing you're an alcoholic when you're standing in the corner store getting ready to buy a bottle of Mad Dog 20/20. Knowledge of your own nature doesn't necessarily change your nature. That's a different journey.

Interesting Somebody Else's Sig: Those who say a thing cannot be done should stay out of the way of the person doing it.