News from the Paramecia Department

Perceptive Americans may note the stunning lack of this kind of information in our normal news channels.

((http://www.who.int/disease-outbreak-news/)

Disease Outbreaks
Reported
21 June 2002
Dengue/dengue haemorrhagic fever in El Salvador

WHO has reported an increase in endemic dengue disease in the country. As of 15 June, 1200 cases of dengue and 101 cases of dengue haemorrhagic fever have been laboratory confirmed. Children between the ages of 5 and 9 years are most affected. Dengue virus serotype 1 has been detected in this outbreak. The President of El Salvador has declared a state of emergency in the departments of San Salvador, Libertad, Santa Ana, and Cabanas and an alert in the rest of the country. The government has established a Command Post incorporating ministries of health, education, government, national police and representatives of municipalities.

Control activities include day and night spraying of larva breeding sites and increased dissemination of public health information and education.

Mexico has offered support for these measures.

For more details on the outbreak, visit the web site of the WHO Regional Office for the Americas

New Do

All CSS, no tables. Visit glish.com/css to learn more.

Tres cool.

From Shakespeare to Synth-Pop

Moonlife, SF pop band extraordinaire, played in San Diego at Club Xanth on Sunday June 16th. If you ever get a chance to see them perform live, take it. Catchiest tunes this side of the planet, and a great live show. Leave your socks at home, they'll get blown off anyway.

The Moor Of Venice

I went to see a production of "Othello" on Friday night by the Women's Repertory Theater. It ruled. Iago is this wonderful villain you just love to hate.

You may note the name "Women's Repertory Theater". Why yes, since you asked, this was an all-women production. And you know what? That is not the most important fact of the production. The most important fact is that Gayle Feldman-Avery (Iago) was a sheer delight, and Sylvia M'Lafi Thompson (Othello) was a beautiful, tragic figure. Second to that, the staging was minimal, and the dress was modern - 1950's/60's, so Desdemona looked alot like Jackie Kennedy, 'twas aptly played by Jo Glover, who really made it work with her demure and restrained gestures. In retrospect, I am reminded of Gemma Jones in pretty much any period film.

MSusan Niemann as Roderigo, Iago's fool, Gina Alvarado as Cassio (whom I adored), Wendy Waddell (Emilia), Helen Marquardt (Brabantio/Gratiano), Morgan Trent (Bianca), Kim Strassburger (various, including the Duke), and Natalie Sentz (various, Montano) rounded out the players.

A well done show, and after about -- what? 5 minutes? -- you don't notice it's women in all the roles. I mean, a few hundred years ago, some youth whose 'nads hadn't dropped yet would have been playing Desdemona. Turn about's fair play, donchaknow.

And just because it's Shakespeare, don't go running around like a chicken with your head cut off (it makes you look silly). Shakespeare is nothing to be frightened of. You'll get it. The story is a simple one -- Iago decides to destroy Othello and Desdemona. He uses Roderigo, Cassio, and Emilia to do it. There, see? Doesn't it sound like a 2-hour long episode of "Dallas"? Hate, love, death -- don't tell me these are unfamiliar themes. You'll do fine.

"Othello" is playing through July 20, 2002 at Actor's Asylum

6663 El Cajon Blvd [*]
San Diego, CA

Thu, Fri, Sat at 8pm, Sun at 7pm, Monday, July 1 at 8pm, and Saturday July 20 2pm matinee. If you are in the SD area, go see it.

619 282 3277
[*] in the Music Trader shopping complex, http://www.actorsasylum.org/

Red Sprites & Blue Jets

Interesting for the meteorologically inclined, if you didn't already know: red sprites and blue jets are upper atmospheric discharges associated with thunderstorms. Like the lightning you're used to seeing, that lights up a cloud from within, or snakes down to touch the ground, sprites and jets are electrical discharges -- just way up high.

Sprites are predominantly red, enormous but weak flashes appearing directly above an acitve thunderstorm system and tend to coincide with the more familiar lightning flashes. They appear to prefer areas of a thunderstorm that are starting to decay. Sprites tend to cluster, don't last very long, and are damn hard to see. So, don't waste your time unless you happen to be hanging around the Earth's atmosphere at around 65-75 km in altitude, over a thunderstorm actively discharging lightning, and you've got some serious low light level equipment on you.

Now, blue jets stream from the top of the electrically active core regions of thunderstorms -- so where red sprites are observed in decaying areas, blue jets like it where the action is still hot. They appear at lower altitudes, hanging around at 40-50km, and flow up and out in a cone-like shape.

Interestingly enough, gamma-ray bursts have been observed over thunderstorm regions at altitudes of greater than 30km. Related? Maybe.

Learn more at

http://elf.gi.alaska.edu
http://www.fma-research.com/spriteres.htm

The Yawn of Doom


Hey, is that like the amulet of Yendor? No, probably not.

So, according to a co-worker, I have a yawn alike unto the sound of a squirrel dying in the jaws of a fox, in the wee hours of the morn. Not a simile he just made up, btw.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled lack-of-posting.

My What?

I don't plan to make a habit of this, but I was intrigued by my results in a "Which D&D Character are You" survey I found via Marshmallows and Bile.

I don't enjoy filling this kinds of surveys out because, well, I find them boring, okay? I just do. But now and then one of 'em catches my eye. The result on this one was just too true I couldn't let it pass without posting it somewhere for posterity. So, here it is, posterity.

I Am A: True Neutral Elf Fighter

True Neutral characters are very rare. They believe that balance is the most important thing, and will not side with any other force. They will do whatever is necessary to preserve that balance, even if it means switching allegiances suddenly.

Elves are the eldest of all races, although they are generally a bit smaller than humans. They are generally well-cultured, artistic, easy-going, and because of their long lives, unconcerned with day-to-day activities that other races frequently concern themselves with. Elves are, effectively, immortal, although they can be killed. After a thousand years or so, they simply pass on to the next plane of existance.

Fighters are the warriors. They use weapons to accomplish their goals. This isn't to say that they aren't intelligent, but that they do, in fact, believe that violence is frequently the answer.

Find out What D&D Character Are You?, courtesy of NeppyMan!

Diplomacy, Shmiplomacy

Someone on the radio made the usual remark of "We should just lock politicians in a room until they work out their (our) problems". Oh, sure, it's a fine idea, many people subscribe to it. But, my goodness, it's so dull. I mean, really, where's the glamour?

So, I think we should make our politicians mud-wrestle, instead. Your average citizen would pay way more attention to the proceedings. Just picture it! We'll broadcast the event over BBC and NHK, get some cute Japanese commentator(s) to emcee the whole thing (hm...think "Iron Chef") and toss our statesmen in the mud. In those white sumo-type loincloth things.

Just imagine the ratings!

Today's Geography Lesson: Aruba

That far-flung tendril of the Kingdom of the Netherlands, best known for a great pair of gams and a walk-on role in the film Mission Impossible. (Who can forget Tom Cruise being asked "would you consider the cinema of the Caribbean -- Aruba, perhaps"? Such poise! Such grace! Alas, a little country like that always gets ignored by the Academy come Oscar time. Tragic, really.)

After initially signing on as a jewel in Spain's crown in 1499, Aruba was stolen by the Dutch -- in 1636 -- in a daring raid filled with high-tech weaponry, squinty-eyed square-jawed heroes, the foiling of laser security systems, and two or three strategically placed explosions.

Sneering delicately south towards Venezuela, Aruba typically portrays exactly the kind of restful vacation spot you'd expect from a place known on-and-offscreen for its white sandy beaches and well-regulated [by trade winds, that is] temperate clime. 81 degrees Fahrenheit last year, this year, and probably next year. Even to the casual observer, it's obvious Aruba lucked out by growing up outside the Caribbean hurricane belt.

Worldly but not weary, the urbane Aruban's performance on the governmental stage [appearing regularly in the capital city of Oranjestad -- check your program for details] typically demonstrates a sophisticated blend of Dutch civil and English common law techniques in the parliamentary democracy The Netherlands is known for.

Aruba is mostly Roman Catholic and multilingual -- Dutch, Papiamento[*], English, and Spanish -- and simply adores tourist's shopping dollars. Aruba's currency is the effortlessly sexy guilder/florin, which has been tied to the US dollar at a fixed rate since the mid-80's.

When on tour with its annual production of Bigger Than Washington DC, And Less Traffic, Too, Aruba typically performs evenings in the major ports of Barcadera, Oranjestad, and Sint Nicolaas, and can usually be spotted at a trendy nightclub after the show indulging in drinks and a little dancing.

To find an Aruba webcam, keeps your eyes peeled for the .aw Internet country code!

A regular importer of -- yep, tourists -- machinery and electrical equipment, crude oil and foodstuffs, Aruba exports animals and animal products, art, machinery and transport equipment, and the occasional laundered drug dollar to The Netherlands, Columbia, and that wacky northern neighbor, the United States.

Aruba's flag is as sophisticated as you might expect: blue, with two narrow, horizontal, yellow stripes across the lower portion and a red, four-pointed star outlined in white in the upper hoist-side corner.

[*] That's a spiffy dialect of Spanish, Portuguese, Dutch and English.

Facts: The CIA World Factbook

Film Critique: Sidra Vitale

Story In The Running

It'll be a few more weeks before I know, but I made it off a Certain Someone's slush pile and onto the "maybe".

I'll say who "Certain Someone" is, if and when. (Keep that suspense building, folks!)

Deviant Aunt Redux


Ha! My sister-in-law is going to have a baby! She just found out, after suspecting for most of this week(ish). Weeeeeeeeee!

Today's Geography Lesson: Burkina Faso

Since I like to bitch about the quality of publik ed-you-kay-shun here in the US, I thought I'd invest a little time in putting my money where my mouth is.

So, as a public service, c'mon everybody, let's learn about Burkina Faso!

To Americans, an itty-bitty Colorado-sized country with a weird name, somewhere in Africa -- that's the big scary continent Joseph Conrad said had a "Heart Of Darkness", somewhere in your senior year of high-school English. To residents, Burkina Faso is home.

The French settlement formerly known as Upper Volta burst onto the fashion scene and into its independence in 1960, setting new trends in population density v. low natural resources, in a neo-classical subsistence agriculture mode highly vulnerable to variations in rainfall.

Wearing Mali and Niger as a hat, Burkina Faso has consistently flaunted fashion ideals -- detractors argue that sporting landlocked savannah year-round leaves little room for flexibility in times of drought. Several hundred thousand residents head south to Ghana and Cote d'Ivoire annually for the relentlessly trendy lifestyle of the migrant farm worker, some waving at the nation's highest point, Tena Kourou (749 m), on their way.

Though lacking coastline, Burkina Faso has close ties to Lake Volta to the south, and is frequently seen in the company of the lake's 3 principal rivers, the Black, Red, and White Voltas.

With a daring religious distribution amongst the Burkinabe of indigenous beliefs [40%-ish], Islam [50%-ish], and a touch of Christianity [10%], Burkina Faso is a country obviously serious about its cosmopolitan mix of culture and language. French is the nation's official language, and 90% of the population speak native African tongues of the Sudanic family.

For governmental affairs, the Burkinabe step out in an always-appropriate-for-evening French-influenced parliamentary system, deftly accessorized with a native constitution and legislative, judicial, and executive branches all their own. Ouagadougou, like all national capitals, drips with a plethora of acronymed political parties and pressure groups.

A regular exporter of cotton, animal products, and gold, Burkina Faso imports machinery, food products, and petroleum from nearby Cote d'Ivoire and not-so-nearby France.

Burkina Faso's flag, two equal horizontal bands of red (top) and green with a yellow five-pointed star in the center; uses the enduringly popular pan-African colors of Ethiopia.

The well-dressed web Burkinabe can often be seen in the sleek ".bf" Internet country code, so be sure to say "bonjour" when you meet them!

Boring Statistics and Facts The CIA World Factbook

Attitude and Fashion Commentary Sidra Vitale

Speaking For Everyone

As I'm frequently asked to speak for All Women Everywhere®, I thought I'd just go ahead and let you all know what All Women Everywhere® like, since, as you know, we're all completely interchangeable, and one woman [me] is fully capable of successfully interpreting to you not only what she likes but what All Women Everywhere® like. This, way, you'll NEVER have to WONDER AGAIN! Wow!

So all 8 gazillion of us would like to set the record straight --

Our Favorite Color is Blue. Very nice.
Our Favorite Ice Cream is Rocky Road.
Our Favorite Drink is the crystal-clear, refreshing water that comes from Secret Woman Springs. Two X chromosomes required for purchase.
Our Favorite Muffin is Banana with Almonds.
Half of the time we like our steak medium rare, the other half of the time we like it medium well, we flip a coin right before ordering in a restaurant, and yes, we do it that way just to piss you off.

Pardon The Hysterical Laughter

I'm not making this up, I swear.

Sherlock Holmes in the 22nd Century .

What, I should expound? Like that wasn't funny enough by itself?

It's some kids cartoon. Holmes was cryogenically frozen, thawed out in the 22nd century by a descendant of Inspector Lestrade and her assistant robot with human head? features? called Watson. It seems Holmes' nemesis Moriarty has been cloned and so Holmes must return to business.

I swear to god, I was stunned for the first minute, then laughing hysterically for several minutes further. Y'see,

you see

All I could think of was Duck Dodgers in the 24th-and-a-half Century . So now I have this weird cross-pollinated image in my head of Sherlock Holmes going up against Marvin the Martian, with Porky Pig as Watson.

See? This is what comes of channel surfing.

You Going to Eat That?

Can we clone animal muscle for the purpose of eating it? Not will we, but can we now? If so, how many people would be too squicked out to eat the stuff?